Pain & Gain Review

Pain & Gain

1.5 stars out of 4

By Brett Takeshita

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you a contender for one of the worst films of 2013: Pain & Gain. It's such a shame because I was hopeful that this would be a slick and fun thrill ride. It has an interesting premise -- which is also based on a true story -- and it boasts an excellent cast. How could such a promising flick go so wrong?

Pain & Gain tells the story of Daniel (Mark Wahlberg), a bodybuilder and personal trainer who finds that he lives an unfulfilling life. Sure, it's comfortable, but there's nothing more to it. After hearing a speech from a motivational speaker (Ken Jeong), Daniel decides that he wants to become a "do-er" and pursue the American dream of wealth and happiness. He gathers up his two friends -- the wisecracking Adrian (Anthony Mackie) and the churchgoing Paul (Dwayne Johnson) -- so that they can kidnap the arrogant Victor (Tony Shalhoub) and unlawfully obtain boatloads of cash. However, this mischievous scheme goes terribly wrong and soon becomes all too complicated. Eventually, a smart detective, Ed (Ed Harris), is hired to chase after these three hooligans, as they attempt to cover up their tracks and get away with their crimes.

I'm not gonna sugarcoat this: Pain & Gain is a mess. I still can't tell what it's trying to be. Is it trying to be a smart movie about incredibly stupid people? If this is what director Michael Bay was attempting to create, then he fails because Pain & Gain just comes across as being ridiculously dumb. And don't think that I'm being too stuck-up about this film, because I can appreciate a dumb action-comedy just like any other moviegoer. It's just that this one is unsuccessful. The script is packed with tons of lazy jokes amidst all of the violence and insanity, but I rarely laughed. The humor did not work for me. And unfortunately, some of the humor involving women and religion just comes across as ugly and distasteful.

The problem with Pain & Gain is the writing in conjunction with Bay's direction. Aside from the terrible jokes, the script is attempting to do too many things. Not only is it about the American dream, but it's also about life in the gym, dirty crimes, awkward relationships, drug addiction, and unashamed hedonism, amongst other things. As you might be able to tell, the script is unfocused, and unfortunately, Bay seems lost. I do not dislike Michael Bay like many other cinephiles. However, here, he just has no control over his film. He doesn't know how to strike the correct balance between thrilling action and wacky comedy. He doesn't understand pacing, for the pacing in this film is insanely erratic. At times, it's super fast and wildly off the charts. Then, it slows down -- especially in the middle -- and drags to the point at which it becomes boring. This film is too long, and then, after a period of time, you end up not caring about most of the characters.

The problem with the cast sorta resides within the problems with the script. The characters in this film are such idiots that the actors don't get to do much with their characters. For example, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson's religious character is supposed to bring a lot of humor with his innocent, boyish personality, which greatly contrasts with Johnson's rugged exterior. However, the character is simply so stupid that Johnson can't really sell the humor. He tries hard to be funny and do what he can, but he falls flat. The same goes for Anthony Mackie. He's supposed to be another one of the comedic characters who tells rapid-fire jokes and lets loose, but we don't care about the character at all. 

However, we do get a couple of really fine performances that save the film from being a total train wreck. It's great that Mark Wahlberg was cast as the lead in this film because he is pretty outstanding. Here, he really fleshes out his character, and even though Daniel is inherently unlikable, we still actually care somewhat about the character, due to the great depth that Wahlberg brings to the screen. Tony Shalhoub and Ed Harris deliver some very nice performances. Shalhoub is brilliantly disgusting and awful, and Harris brings some great gravity to an otherwise shallow film. The biggest standout in the film is Rebel Wilson as Robin, Adrian's nurse and eventual girlfriend. It seems like she improvised her lines, and she absolutely nails each scene. She's the only actor in the film capable of delivering some true laughs. I would have rather watched a whole movie about Rebel Wilson's character than Pain & Gain as it stands.

I usually love "American dream" films, violent action thrillers, and dumb gross-out comedies. Pain & Gain is the synthesis of these three types of films, so it would seem that I would have loved this film. However, I highly disliked it. It's frustrating and baffling in its incoherence and stupidity. It's pretty close to being a pile of garbage, if it weren't for some strong performances. Some critics are praising this movie and hailing it as one of Michael Bay's best films. However, I strongly disagree. This is not funny or exciting or all that interesting. It's just plain stupid. Out of all of the films that I've seen thus far in 2013, I am sad to report that Pain & Gain is the worst. One and a half stars out of four.